Elder Ulisses Soares on serving with compassion

Elder Ulisses Soares (born October 2, 1958 in Brazil) has served as a Seventy since April 2005, and as a member of the Presidency of the Seventy since January 2013. He was sustained to the Quorum of Twelve Apostles on April 1, 2018.

"My dear friends, as we intentionally strive to incorporate a compassionate attitude into our way of life, as exemplified by the Savior, we will become more sensitive to people’s needs. With that increased sensitivity, feelings of genuine interest and love will permeate our every action. The Lord will recognize our efforts, and we will surely be blessed with opportunities to be instruments in His hands in softening hearts and in bringing relief to those whose 'hands … hang down' (D&C 81:5).

"Jesus’s admonition to Simon the Pharisee also made it clear that we should never make harsh and cruel judgment of our neighbor, because we are all in need of understanding and mercy for our imperfections from our loving Heavenly Father. Wasn’t this exactly what the Savior taught on another occasion when He said, 'And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?' (Matt 7:3.)

"We need to consider that it is not easy to understand all the circumstances that contribute to someone’s attitude or reaction. Appearances can be deceptive and oftentimes do not represent an accurate measurement of someone’s behavior. Unlike you and me, Christ is capable of clearly seeing all facets of a given situation. Even knowing all our weaknesses as He does, the Savior does not rashly condemn us but continues to work with us compassionately over time, helping us to remove the beam from our eye. Jesus always looks on the heart and not on the appearance. He Himself declared, 'Judge not according to the appearance' (John 7:24)."

- Ulisses Soares, "The Savior’s Abiding Compassion," General Conference October 2021, Saturday morning

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Elder Soares addressed a principle that is one of the most significant and important aspects of Christian discipleship—compassion and service. As we grow in our desire to help others, we'll be more sensitive to their needs, and our actions will reflect what is in our hearts.

I was grateful for this reminder—opportunities to serve will come to those who are prepared and seeking them.

As we seek for those in need of help and love, we must never judge unrighteously. People can be in need for many reasons, often not their own fault; only the Savior can truly evaluate what is in the heart and spirit. Our responsibility is to give, unselfishly and lovingly, whenever we see a need.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2021)

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf on treating others with love and forgiveness

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf (born November 6, 1940) served as a Seventy from 1994-2004, when he was called as a member of the Quorum of Twelve.  He served as second counselor in the First Presidency from 2008 to 2018.

"This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following:

"Stop it!

"It’s that simple. We simply have to stop judging others and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love for God and His children. God is our Father. We are His children. We are all brothers and sisters. I don’t know exactly how to articulate this point of not judging others with sufficient eloquence, passion, and persuasion to make it stick. I can quote scripture, I can try to expound doctrine, and I will even quote a bumper sticker I recently saw. It was attached to the back of a car whose driver appeared to be a little rough around the edges, but the words on the sticker taught an insightful lesson. It read, 'Don’t judge me because I sin differently than you.'

"We must recognize that we are all imperfect—that we are beggars before God. Haven’t we all, at one time or another, meekly approached the mercy seat and pleaded for grace? Haven’t we wished with all the energy of our souls for mercy—to be forgiven for the mistakes we have made and the sins we have committed?

"Because we all depend on the mercy of God, how can we deny to others any measure of the grace we so desperately desire for ourselves? My beloved brothers and sisters, should we not forgive as we wish to be forgiven?"

- Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "The Merciful Obtain Mercy," General Conference April 2012
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While serving as a member of the First Presidency, President Uchtdorf shared many powerful messages, and this is a very memorable one. He encouraged us to consider our relationships with one another and to think about the need for love and forgiveness in those interactions. Too often we hold on to grudges and disagreements, as well as treating others with less respect than they deserve; and his advice was very simple: "Stop it!"

When we truly have "a heart full of love for God and His children" it will change our interactions with each other, and we will be more accepting, loving, and forgiving. We depend on mercy from God; we must offer it freely to one another.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2019)

Elder Bruce R. McConkie on writing our own book of life

Elder Bruce R. McConkie (July 29, 1915–April 19, 1985) served as a Seventy from 1946-1972 when he was called to the Quorum of Twelve.  He served in that assignment until his death from cancer at age 69.

"In a real though figurative sense, the book of life is the record of the acts of men as such record is written in their own bodies. It is the record engraven on the very bones, sinews, and flesh of the mortal body. That is, every thought, word and deed has an effect on the human body; all these leave their marks, marks which can be read by Him who is Eternal as easily as the words in a book can be read.

"By obedience to telestial law men obtain telestial bodies; terrestrial law leads to terrestrial bodies; and conformity to celestial law—because this law includes the sanctifying power of the Holy Ghost—results in the creation of a body which is clean, pure, and spotless, a celestial body. (D&C 88:16-32.) When the book of life is opened in the day of judgment (Rev. 20:12-15), men's bodies will show what law they have lived. The Great Judge will then read the record of the book of their lives; the account of their obedience or disobedience will be written in their bodies."

- Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine, s.v. "Book of Life," p. 97

The classic scripture that mentions "the book of life" is from the Revelation at the end of the New Testament:

And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. (Revelation 20:12)

These are normally interpreted as physical books, containing a record of good deeds and misdeeds. But I like Elder McConkie's suggestion; our very bodies could be considered a "book of life" in recording the impact of our decisions and actions—"every thought, word and deed." Our countenance often reflects more than we realize about those decisions and priorities; and certainly, with the profound and divine insight of "The Great Judge" reading the book, there are many more evidences than we mortals can recognize.

Elder McConkie suggests that the very nature of our body changes based on the kind of law we choose to live. Those who follow celestial laws develop and inherit celestial bodies. It's not just a reward at the end of mortality; it's developed throughout mortality. So then in a very real sense, "the account of their obedience or disobedience will be written in their bodies." Interesting to ponder! There is so much more to caring for and developing this body than just the traditional prescriptions and proscriptions of our code of health.

(Compilation and commentary by David Kenison, Orem, Utah, 2017)

Elder Dallin H. Oaks on learning to judge righteously

Elder Dallin H. Oaks (b. August 12, 1932) served as president of BYU from 1971-1980.  He was then appointed as a justice of the Utah Supreme Court, and resigned when he was called to the Quorum of Twelve Apostles in 1984.

"We should, if possible, refrain from judging until we have adequate knowledge of the facts. In an essay titled 'Sitting in the Seat of Judgment,' the great essayist William George Jordan reminded us that character cannot be judged as dress goods—by viewing a sample yard to represent a whole bolt of cloth (see The Crown of Individuality [1909], 101-5).

"In another essay he wrote: 'There is but one quality necessary for the perfect understanding of character, one quality that, if man have it, he may dare to judge—that is, omniscience. Most people study character as a proofreader pores over a great poem: his ears are dulled to the majesty and music of the lines, his eyes are darkened to the magic imagination of the genius of the author; that proofreader is busy watching for an inverted comma, a misspacing, or a wrong font letter. He has an eye trained for the imperfections, the weaknesses....

"'We do not need to judge nearly so much as we think we do. This is the age of snap judgments.... [We need] the courage to say, "I don't know. I am waiting further evidence. I must hear both sides of the question." It is this suspended judgment that is the supreme form of charity' ("The Supreme Charity of the World," The Kingship of Self-Control [n.d.], 27-30; emphasis in original).

"Someone has said that you cannot slice cheese so fine that it doesn't have two sides....

"May God bless us that we may have that love and that we may show it in refraining from making final judgments of our fellowman. In those intermediate judgments we are responsible to make, may we judge righteously and with love. The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of love. Our Master whom we seek to serve is, as the scriptures say, a 'God of love' (2 Cor. 13:11). May we be examples of His love and His gospel."

- Dallin H. Oaks, "'Judge Not' and Judging," talk at BYU on March 1, 1998; see Ensign, August 1999, pp. 6-13
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I was fascinated by the excerpts Elder Oaks shares. It's one thing to judge a bolt of cloth by the exposed pattern we can see; but that is because we assume the rest of the bolt reflects the same pattern, and so we are seeing an exact representation of the entire product at a glance. But that does not work for our interactions with one another. With people and situations, we can't possibly grasp the intricacies of a personality or of complex motivations based on superficial assumptions.

A second danger is to assume we can understand the character of another based on a proofreader-like examination for flaws. We miss the "majesty and music" in others when all we do is notice their mistakes or shortcomings.

Finally, we are cautioned to reserve judgment while we await "further evidence" and a more complete picture of the facts of a situation. Very wise counsel for any who have been victims of the consequences of hasty judgement.

This entire talk by Elder Oaks is very thought-provoking and contains wonderful counsel.

A few years ago I wrote an essay on a similar topic, based on some of my personal experiences, titled "Judge Righteous Judgment."